When to ditch the monitor?

Disclaimer 1: This post has nothing to do with minions

Disclaimer 2: Not likely to be a groundbreaking read, in fact if you don’t have kids, stop right here.

We moved little Baby G into her own room at 6 months, just 4 months ago. (Have you figured how old she is yet?!).

The thing is, things aren’t going so great. She goes to bed amazingly by 7 every night, and sleeps… ‘Like a baby’ until the nanosecond I get into my own bed and close my eyes. Then, she’ll wake every hour or couple of hours till the morning.

She has a bunny and dummy for nap and bedtimes, so we fumble around her cot for them in the dark, give them back to her in our zombie state, and wobble back to bed. *Repeat several times throughout night*.

It’s not so bad as there is no extended periods of ‘awake’ but the broken sleep is  slowly killing me through tiredness and I’m pretty sure we are fuelling the fire in how we’re dealing with the situation?

This week we turned off the baby monitor. I’m not entirely sure it was helping the situation as every tiny mumble, grizzle was being stereo boomed into my eardrum, making me leap from my bed to her room in one sudden catapult, in fear of her waking her 3 y o sister.

When toddler-g went through the waking at night stage it was so much easier to do the ‘learning to self settle’ thing, because…

a) she sucked her thumb, so could always find that herself

b) there was no other small person around we were petrified of disturbing and doubling our awaken child situation

It made me wonder, when is the right time to switch off the monitor? I guess when it’s right for you. After all, we don’t live in a mansion, and she certainly isn’t sleeping in the West Wing. Separated by an adjoining wall and 2 open doors, any cries of distress aren’t exactly going to be missed.

There are other factors playing on my mind; mainly the dummy. Is it making things worse? Should we go cold turkey and ditch it now? Not been here before so it’s all an unknown. Is she too little? After all it’s a great prop to get her back to sleep quick?

What if she’s just teething? She’s 10 months and none have cut through yet, so she must be uncomfortable?

Either way I wonder if we need to try and establish a little bit of self soothing education if we are going to ever get a whole nights sleep again?

With our eldest we ditched the monitor almost immediately after putting her in her own room. Not because we are big old meanies, but because she suffered with an early presentation of seasonal asthma which resulted in a night cough. All night. Every night. She slept happily through it, us not so much. The monitor only exacerbated the situation. We were of course able to hear and go to her when she needed us, but we could hear that for ourselves.

Always handy for summer evenings in the garden or if we are downstairs after kids bedtime, the monitors still there; but at night, for now, it’s being switched off.

The dummy, we’ll keep thinking about that one….

Any advice on this greatly received!


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A Cornish Mum

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10 thoughts on “When to ditch the monitor?

  1. hopecarter145 Reply

    I love the honesty! Im expeiencing the same thing atm. My angel has a dummy and she loves her blankets. She sleeps like a log until goto bed and exactly like you I’m zombiefied due to the sevear lack of sleep.

    1. mummuddlingthrough Reply

      Better night last night here?! Thanks for stopping by and good luck tonight x MMT

  2. min1980 Reply

    It’s so difficult to know what to do. I would say just do what feels right for you and trust your instincts. My little one is a year old and still sleeps in my bed (cue anxious relatives telling me that I am “too soft” and he will “still be in there when he’s ten,”) but it helps both of us to get more sleep so that’s fine!

  3. Beau is Blue (@beauisblue) Reply

    Oh, i did a post on this and had a mixture of comments, i ditched the monitor around 6 months if i remember rightly. Our room is right next to his and yes we were worrried we all slept so much better i think, now a year down the line and we haven’t looked back – he will cry if he needs us or settles himself by himself whereas any sound he made when we had the monitor i would rush through to check he was okay! Thanks for sharing and thanks for being so honest! Suz x beauisblue.com

  4. awesomeausterity Reply

    Oh I have been exactly where you are and I’m not sure I have much useful advice but lots of sympathy. We ditched the dummy at six months. She learned to self settle fairly quickly (with a fair amount of crying) but this didn’t stop the night wakening. That went on until around 18 months. We had to use the monitor because she slept at the other end of the house and we genuinely didn’t hear her- perhaps that wouldn’t have been a bad thing! The only thing I would say is that from my experience a three year old can sleep through anything so I wouldn’t worry about her disturbing her sister too much.

    Good luck whatever you decide. #picknmix

  5. Becky Reply

    Oh dear I really feel for you, we went through the exact same thing, and are just about coming out the other side. It’s amazing how terrible getting up 3 or 4 times every night makes you feel isn’t it, even if it is only for a few minutes. We decided not to ditch the dummy as it was helping her (and us) get some sleep but yes she kept loosing it too. Our health visitor suggested getting a dummy holder and attaching it to her pjs (she was 2 at the time so may not be appropriate for a ten month old) and it worked. For one night. Then she totally freaked out about it to the point of almost being sick! You could put two or three in her cot so she has more chance of finding it. And instead of just popping it back in her mouth, guide her hand to it so she learns to do it herself. We are now trying to wean a two and half year old off the dummy… No easy task. She is sleeping much better now, strangely if got better when we took the sides off the cot. Sorry this probably isn’t helping much. But I think you are right to turn off the monitor, as you say, you’ll still hear her ‘proper’ cries. Good luck, it does get better! Becky x

    1. mummuddlingthrough Reply

      Thanks Becky, I think she cut a tooth this week so maybe thats been a big part of it? Here’s hoping! x MMT

  6. acornishmum Reply

    I only ever used monitors with my two if I was downstairs and they were up and I might not have heard them otherwise. I am also a really heavy sleeper so I only ever woke for the ‘proper’ cries, which I think helped as they learnt to self settle early on and I didn’t rush in and wake them up properly when they were just stirring. They both slept through from 7 or 8 weeks but in all honesty I think a lot of that is genetics as they are such heavy sleepers! Good luck hon and hope you get some decent sleep!
    Thanks for linking up to #PicknMix
    Stevie x

  7. Mummyandmonkeys Reply

    We are in exactly the same situation with the night wakenings! Total nightmare. I’m bf so she tends to come in with me as it’s the only way I can survive. I’ve tried sitting up to feed and then putting her back in to her cot and wake up half an hour later asleep sitting up! She doesn’t have a dummy (not through lack of trying) and has no teeth either so I’m wondering if that is bothering her at the moment. The last two nights she has screamed and screamed when her Dad has gone in and will only calm down for me, nor fun! Thanks for linking to #PickNMix

  8. TinyWeanyMummy Reply

    Try to ditch the dummy now. My 3 yo still has hers and craves it through the day. I mostly refuse her. But it drives me insane that I cannot get her to give it up. She lost it tonight before bed and I told her if she can’t look after it and find it then she can’t have it. Seems to have gone off to sleep without it but I’m dreading if she stirs in the night looking for it!
    Great advice on the monitors. X

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