The HOORAY moments of being a stay at home Mum

I’m often asked what it’s like being a stay at home Mum, and if it makes me happy. My standard response is this;

“There are some days I’m tearing my hair out and it’s bloody hard work, yet there are other days when I feel like the luckiest person on the planet”.

I’ve written so many posts about why being a parent is hard, why I miss my old part time working set up, why sometimes it’s a struggle to stay sane as a stay at home Mum, yet I’ve never written exactly what I LOVE about being at home with the kids at this point in life.

Perhaps the reason being that I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I don’t want to be smug, gloating about some kind of perfect existence whilst there are probably people who might love to have this chance but for whatever reason cannot. Or perhaps those who quite frankly just couldn’t do it, and might see me as some kind of over the top perfect mother (and we all know how irritating that can be).

I once read a post about why working Mums make better Mums, and to be totally honest, it cut like a knife. So, let’s get it out there right now, I do not believe stay at home parents make better parents. I do not believe working parents make better parents. I believe parents that love their kids with all their capability, try with everything they have to give them the best start, who retain a sense of self amongst the chaos of parenthood, the ones that are trying their best make the BEST parents.

But, in the spirit of positivity, and for anyone wondering why the hell I DON’T just go back to work in my old science career, here is why.

PERKS | Being a stay at home Mum is sometimes tough, for sure…BUT I’d be lying if I said there weren’t the occasional benefits ;-). Like for example, the new pre school being next door to the best tea room in town. Nom. . . . . . . . #coolmumclub #totsphoto #perfectandproud #rockingmummylife #clickinmoms #littlefierceones #childhoodunplugged #thismamaloves #366daysofpositive #myhappycapture #thismamaloves #dearphotographer #thatsdarling #funseekingkids #oureverydaymoments #cameramama #littlefierceones #ig_motherhood #pixelkids #cherisheverymoment #thehappynow #rememberingthesedays #littleandbrave #childofig #pinklinker #happylittlebuttons #tribalchat #capturingtheday #lionessmama #livingfearlesslyauthentic

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    1. I don’t have to go to work. Let’s just think about that again. I don’t have to go to work! Can I get a whoop whoop! Now don’t get me wrong I enjoyed some elements of working, but there were certainly parts of it that appealed like a hole in the head. There’s a reason everyone gets all get excited about Fridays right? For me, now every day is a Friday and that sinking Sunday night feeling is no more.
    2. It’s opened up options for my children. Being a working Mum to pre-school kids can be a bit of a headache as the pre-school system seems to be geared around the hours of 9-12. Being made redundant meant we moved from one childcare option (a local day nursery) to dozens of lovely different pre-schools in our area.
    3. We know how to work the toddler group circuit. I remember going back to work after my first and feeling so gutted that we’d no longer get to go to the couple of groups where we’d met lovely people and had been our lifeline in that first year of parenthood. The littles have still been able to do all the groups that they love right up until they’ve got too big for them, or quite frankly, got bored of them.
    4. We are mid-week social butterflies. With so many friends having had young children in the last few years, keeping in touch at weekends alone would be a real tricky thing to achieve. Weekends are so precious and with endless kids parties, family events and (every now and again) a day all to ourselves, that being able to hang out with all the Mums and kids during the week has been priceless. We know exactly who is around on which days and there is never a dull moment in the midweek meet-ups schedule. The glory days of summer are here and there is no better time to be a stay at home Mum, believe me. But then again, those cosy snuggly winter days are pretty spesh too…
    5. Breakfast dates. With or without the kids, the mid-week post school run garden centre brekkie date with pals has to be one of the golden moments of stay at home Motherhood. The tea room, the cake, the fry up… it’s a massive highlight of the week! Indulgent? Perhaps. Earnt? DEFINITELY!
    6. The childcare hustle no more. Never again have we had to make the heartbreaking call to send a not quite 100% child to nursery or school because we really needed to be in that day.We celebrate the start of the summer holidays together as it means 6 weeks of fun without having to worry about any kind of childcare schedule. Inset days, half days, polling station days, they’re no skin off my nose and the stress elimination is priceless.
    7. Shit gets done. The sorting out of the shed. The decluttering of the wardrobes that won’t shut. The laundry. The grocery shopping. The nipping to the post office. This all seamlessly blends around our home existence meaning that evenings and weekends are our own to spend as a family. There may be a time you grab a couple of hours child free whilst tot is at nursery – clearly inadequate time to squeeze in a day at the office but perfect time to crack few some of those annoying little tasks that just need to be done…
    8. We call the shots. Some weeks we’ll work the toddler group circuit like a boss. Other weeks we hibernate indoors like a couple of recluses and blissfully play and chill to our hearts desire. We go where we want to go, because we have nowhere we need to be.
    9. It’s opened up opportunities. Being at home with the children has opened my eyes to what possibilities there are other than being ‘at work’ or ‘at home’. There are ways and means to make working around motherhood possible – and if you really want it, you can make it happen.
    10. I am here for my girls. Yes, don’t worry I hadn’t forgotten this one – I was saving the biggy until last. Being at home with the kids means I am the one here to hug them when they are upset. To laugh with them when the hilarious happens. To do their homework and to coerce them into eating. To explain what things just aren’t okay to say or do, and to praise them when they make me burst with pride. To potty train, to braid their hair, to make sure their bags are packed with the right things. To sing their favourite songs on the way to school, and to be the one waiting for them when the door opens at the end of the day. In the same way  my Mum was the consistent figure throughout my childhood memories, I want to be theirs. To never miss an assembly, a sports day, a school or nursery meeting, a hospital appointment or a chat with the teacher. I can nurse them when they are sick, take them to their swimming lessons, cook impromptu tea for their pals and be here to listen when they need to tell me anything at all. I know I moan about all these things, but in all honesty, being the one to do all these things with my kids is an absolute privilege.

    STRIPES & SQUEEZES | How’s your Thursday going #instamum crew? We are rocking a load of smiles, stripes and squeezes today after this little one and her sister had the best night sleep in, erm, forever! It seems as though the broken nights and ridic early starts are fading away? Or did I just jinx it? Getting woken up with a kiss and a coffee and a calm house seriously beats the grumpy demands of a pre-cbeebies Peppa Pig-athon which seemed like it was never going to give. In other news it’s Thursday and the #coolmumclub blogger link up is in full flow so head on over to have a read, find some new bloggers to follow, or, of course link up your own fab posts that need a little bit of limelight. @motherhoodrealdeal and I will be reading, commenting, tweeting and pinning your posts because quite frankly, you are all super cool Mamas. . . . . . . . . #thismamaloves #mummyshot #ukparentbloggers #myhappycapture #livingfearlesslyauthentic #pinklinker #totsphoto #snaphappybritmums #lionessmama #rockingmummylife #mydarlingmemory #funseekingkids #childofig #littlefierceones #outdoorsandfree #chasingnature #happylittlebuttons #whatevertheweather #rememberingthesedays #capturingtheday #perfectandproud #bestofmom #candidchildhood #theeverydayproject #photosinbetween #thesearethedays #inspiremyinstagram

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    Being a stay at home Mum isn’t always a bed of roses, but every now and again it’s important to remember that those girls won’t always need me as much as they do right now. And while they need me, I’m right here – and there’s nowhere on earth I’d rather be, because in the words of Aerosmith…I don’t wanna miss a thing.

    x MMT

Rhyming with Wine
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26 thoughts on “The HOORAY moments of being a stay at home Mum

  1. talkingmums1 Reply

    I’ve just written a post very similar! I love being a SAHM, yes it’s blumin hard sometimes and there are days when I wonder if I’m doing the right thing but then I realise I am doing the right thing, for us. Well done for sharing some positivity around being a SAHM x

  2. franbackwithabump Reply

    There are definitely are lots of perks of being a SAHM. I’m just not sure I could do it. I love Pops but she’s so full on at this age that nursery and working 3 days is a godsend! Thanks for hosting #coolmumclub xx

  3. Stefani Reply

    I just love this and I’ve read it at the perfect time. I’m having a pity party this week and missing my old job (just a little – I worked with witches) I miss the escape where I don’t have to know as much as Google, seperate fights or wipe snot off my shoulder. This post reminded me why I made the choices I did and all the blessings I get daily, thank you.

  4. oldhouseintheshires Reply

    I think whatever kind of mum you are; stay at home, working or working part time, lets celebrate that woman should have the choice (although some don’t) to do what feels right for them. I have done them all and it’s finding the balance that is right for you at different stages of your life. Lovely post! #Coolmumclub

  5. motherhoodtherealdeal Reply

    Love this – being a stay at home mum definitely has its upsides…you had me at that fry up! Sending lot of #coolmumclub hurrahs your way xoxo

  6. Frilly Pretty Things Reply

    This is so lovely to read all the positives. I’m currently in working-from-home-juggling-two-children-self-employment hell and considering sacking it all in to be a SAHM so this is definitely food for thought. #coolmumclub

  7. mamagrace Reply

    I love being a SAHM but most of all I like that you’ve pointed out that it doesn’t matter if your a SAHM, WM or PTWM. #coolmumclub

  8. talkingmums1 Reply

    Just popping back for #coolmumclub. Fab post x

  9. Lucy grace Reply

    Love this! Have been grappling with my SAHM status lately and this has revived me a lot! Xxx #coolmumclub

  10. @JaxFortyNorth - Mummy's Little Monkey Reply

    I’m a WAHM and – as insane as my days sometimes (usually) are – I wouldn’t change it for anything! I love the freedom, and the fact I never quite know what each new day will hold, and the fact I can attend every school play, meeting, art show and sports day (even if some of them bore me to actual tears…). 😉 x

  11. Hayley - I am River Reply

    A women’s worst enemies are other women, we just love dragging each other down. I love being a SAHM, but I would never believe I’m a better mum than women who work. We all just do what we have to do or want to do, shame it all gets judged! I love this post, and I love how you were able to talk about the positives of your life whilst complimenting all other mums just doing there best x #coolmumclub

  12. thehollyhockdoor Reply

    This is such a well-reasoned post and I love how considerate you are of other people’s choices. I totally agree that the stress reduction is a huge plus – the agonies of juggling a career and frequently sick kiddos made me so unhappy! Your last point about being around and available for little ones is may favourite -I’m hoping to do more of that with my third baby! Visiting from #coolmumclub and following you now 😉

  13. Aleena Brown Reply

    I couldn’t agree more with you on everyone’s choices/work set ups being totally irrelevant to their parenting skills. Well said! This post has really resonated with me; after I had Amelia I desperately wanted to go back to work. I went back full time, didn’t cut it and switched to a part time, less stressful job. When pregnant with Wills I thought I’d feel exactly the same so I went back to my part time job. Difference is now, I don’t really want to work… There’s more to do at home, more to miss, just more of everything really!! So when we move next week, I will no longer be working, and I can’t bloody wait!!! #coolmumclub

  14. Musings of a tired mummy...zzz... Reply

    I count myself as a SAHM even though i have 3 jobs because they are in the evenings so I don’t miss anything with the kids (maybe bathtime once a month). I know I’m lucky to have the best of both but it is exhausting! #coolmumclub

  15. mummyhereandthere Reply

    This is ace reasons X #coolmumclub

  16. susielhawes Reply

    Love, Love, LOVE this post! It made me well up a bit. I’m hormonal, but still. It’s exactly how I feel on the good days (apart from the post school run drop off breakfast – hello! need to get me some of that!) But yep, being a SAHM is bloody hard, some days I wonder why I bother, or that I’d be better off at work, but other days, like you say, it’s a privilege. I only hope I can continue to be a SAHM when my daughter goes to school, perhaps carving out some freelance work around it. Rather than being scared of the future, it makes me excited. Thank you! xx #coolmumclub

  17. Charlotte Stein Reply

    After writing a post Boug how stressful the end of term had been to me, I needed to read this and remind myself why I stay at home. There really are so many positive reasons and usually I do know this but have slightly lost sight with the end of year chaos. I love the fact I don’t miss any school plays etc and that I’m my own boss. This has inspired me to write another post but on a positive slant Thank you x

  18. Rhyming with Wine Reply

    So many things about this give me the happies. I work the end of the week and just two days so I can totally relate. There isn’t a Sunday night goes by that I don’t feel a little bit blessed to not have that “Monday-eve” feeling. I have a whole new appreciation for garden centres too. Who knew that was where all the best cake was at? Thanks for linking to #DreamTeam Sarah xx

  19. Alana - Burnished Chaos Reply

    Brilliant post. I love being a SAHM and although some days I long for adult conversation or a visit to the bathroom in peace, I thank my lucky stars every day that we are in a position to make this possible x

  20. Tooting Mama Reply

    That’s been the best thing being here for the kids, without a doubt, that’s been the winner. Oh and having a quiet coffee and croissant in a cafe after drop off, bliss! #coolmumclub

  21. Muffintopmummyblog Reply

    I am having to go back to work part-time at the end of mat leave but would absolutely love to be a SAHM. However, I put a lot of thought into it, and at the moment, I need the extra money for life stuff (fun things like house buying etc) so I’m trying to make peace with it. We’ll see how it pans out, but I’m always open to being a SAHM! #coolmumclub

  22. Cheryl @ Tea or Wine Reply

    Ahh this is lovely. I’m with you. The last one is definitely the main reason we do it! #CoolMumClub xx

  23. Crummy Mummy Reply

    Love the flip flop tan lines – that’s got to be a perk too right? #coolmumclub

  24. Mrs Mummy Harris Reply

    For me, it doesn’t matter whether you’re a working mum or a SAHP, as long as you love your kids thats all that matters. #coolmumclub

  25. Dr. Elise Cohen Ho Reply

    I once read a post about why working Mums make better Mums, and to be totally honest, it cut like a knife. <- This kind of statement made by that other website is exactly why I do the type of work that I do. We need to respect each other's choices and support one another so we can all raise more wonderful children.

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