9 types of sleep deprivation

I’m sorry. I was that smug Mum that you got chatting to who you wanted to poke in the eye, as she described how her baby slept all night every night from a ridiculously young age. I realise now how much you must have hated me.

I hope it consoles you that I am paying for it now. ‘No two babies are the same’; never was a truer word said when it comes to sleep, in our house.

So, a year into my sleep deprivation saga, here is a round up of some of my favourite worst types of rubbish nights.

1. The newborn cluster feeds. These aren’t so bad to be fair – I actually loved the silent night time snuggles when the chaos of the house was at peace. ‘Enjoy them while they last’ I told myself through the haze of newborn love.

2. Baby confused night with day. For no apparent reason, baby decides to wake up in the small hours and decide this is a brilliant time to seize the day. Happy, wide awake, playful, standing up in the cot and certainly not going back to sleep anytime soon…this all night raver will be doing the walk of shame back to bed just as the rest of the household needs to get up to start the day.

3. The ‘not really awake’ awake. Less of an intense stint of crying / playfulness than point 2, this favourite of mine involves baby grizzling in sleep – losing a dummy or comforter, and crying just enough for you to go in to soothe them – in time to watch them drop back off as you approach the cot. Repeat this up to 1000 times throughout the night – baby never really woke up…you never really slept.

4. The poorly baby. One moment you’re in a zombie state muttering ‘FFS’ under your breath, the next you are hit with a sledgehammer of guilt as you realise your baby has been sick / has a temperature / is covered in spots / any other ailment…that explains it. You go from asleep to awake in 0.2 of a second and adopt full maternal caring mode. Poor little mite. You will happily cuddle them all night long to know they are okay. Plenty of time for sleep tomorrow night.

5. I think it’s her teeth. Can present in any number of ways (1-4) amongst others. You won’t really know what the hell is going on but it’s probably to blame somewhere along the line from age 12 months – 12 years.

6. The Tag Team. It’s a conspiracy they planned together against you surely. One just dropped off, the other wakes up. Then vice versa. You and your other half have lost count of whose turn it is and the result is a game of musical chairs beds. You wake up in the morning in a blur of who is where, the toddler finds it hilarious. You, not so much.

7. The kids went to bed too early. They were tired, they missed a nap, they’d got up so early, they had a really busy day…so being sounds asleep by 6pm was such a good idea at the time. At 4 am the next day, when they’d had their quota, it doesn’t seem to have paid off.

8. The kids (and us) had a late night. They coped pretty well and will surely lay in. Will they HELL. They’ll get up earlier than normal just because you’re so tired, and all of you will be miserable most of the day.

9. Why am I awake? I’ve moaned all day about how tired I am. I’ve dreamt about being in this bed (daydreamt, obviously). I just got the baby / toddler off to sleep again, the house is silent, and I am WIDE AWAKE. Possibly the worst of all the above, your mind just won’t switch off, and you’re painfully watching the minutes on the clock get closer to the time you know you’ll be getting up for work / the baby / the school run. These night time soul searches will be when you’ll probably think of amazing christmas present ideas, have a new blog written in your head, or have some other amazing idea…but you won’t remember any of it tomorrow.


In my experience, any of the above nights generally result in one of two outcomes:

a) I’m so tired I can’t cope with anything today. Going out, staying in, the TV, any activities, any crying children, cooking, bathtime, getting dressed…

b) I’m so tired and I have no idea how or why I’m feeling absolutely fine?

Either way, stick the kettle on, get some coffee inside you. Try and get some fresh air and some (adult) company to moan about your night to. Plan your early night, go to bed at the same time as the kids – heaven.

Tomorrow can only be better…can’t it?



A Cornish Mum
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39 thoughts on “9 types of sleep deprivation

  1. Laura's Lovely Blog Reply

    OMG all of this applies to me ha ha. I hate lying awake at night being so tired and not being able to sleep and what is it with the tag team?
    My eldest slept like a dream, my youngest was a ride awakening! x

    1. admin Reply

      It’s killer isn’t it? I’ve survived the last 12 months on coffee and am horrified by what constitutes a ‘good night’ these days πŸ˜‰ x

  2. frillyprettythings Reply

    It amazes me how we can actually hold a conversation and appear sane on so little sleep when pre-children I would have been an incoherent mess on anything less than 7 hours. You’re right, tomorrow can only get better! Sending positive sleep vibes to you xx

    1. MMT Reply

      I am having a ‘feeling fab’ day today, even though I was out till eleven and was up at least three times….amazing how we get so used to it isn’t it?! thanks for stopping by, have a good night πŸ™‚ x

  3. chloelifeunexpected Reply

    So spot on. Sleep is so underrated. I miss sleep. We have the teether at the moment and I’m definitely no.1 at the end. x #picknmix

  4. mrscraftyb Reply

    A very relatable post! I am also familiar with being the cocky first time mum with a nightmare of a sleeper second time round! Also had lots of practice with going from asleep to awake VERY quickly in the face of puke!!!

  5. Robyn Reply

    What a great post, and SO funny! Good to have a bit of a laugh about the whole thing and also to realise that my reactions (esp. no. 4) are universal. #justanotherlinky

    1. MMT Reply

      Thank you! It’s always nice to know we are not alone in our zombie States! Thanks for making my day by telling me I’m funny x

  6. crummymummy1 Reply

    I know all of this only too well – Little B will be one at the end of the month and I’m still waiting for the first night he sleeps through… #justanotherlinky

    1. MMT Reply

      Snap! It’s gotta be soon right?!

  7. Jodie Allen (@beautybabyblog) Reply

    I totally sympathise with the last point. I suffer with insomnia – I have since I was little. Which means often I am running on as little as 1 hours sleep a day. It nearly kills me somedays. So in my household it’s actually me who’s causing the problem! my little girl actually sleeps like a dream which i totally didn’t expect! #justanotherlinky

  8. ljdove23 Reply

    Haha this really made me laugh. I have four children, three of which were born in the space of two years, so sleep deprivation is very real in our household!!! I have hit the hallucination stage, the “I want a divorce!!” stage, the plotting to smother my husband who sleeps beside me stage…..but we have survived the worst!!! It can only get better from here…right?! #justanotherlinky

    1. MMT Reply

      Wowzer. That is hardcore procreation! Glad to hear you’re still alive and married… Onwards and upwards! X

      1. ljdove23 Reply

        HAHA yes, most definitely was not part of our plan but wouldn’t change it for the world!! If our marriage can survive that level of sleep deprivation, it can survive anything!!! xx

  9. Silly Mummy Reply

    Yes,r all familiar. Eldest has slept well from a year, but awful before. Youngest still not sleeping through at 14 months. #justanotherlinky

  10. Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap) Reply

    haha so true! I’m sure all of these have happened to me at some point!! I hate being awake and not being able to sleep when everyone else is though the most!! xx #justanotherlinky

  11. rhymingwithwine Reply

    Brilliant post, and I am familiar with every type *sobs* I have no idea how I coped with the newborn stage. I go into a state of frenzy now if either of them dare to wake me even once now? #justanotherlinky x

  12. Suburban Mum Reply

    Fab post and so very true! I can relate to each and every one of those in one way or another! Just last night my youngest stirred and needed his nose wiped – he went back off to sleep and I was then wide awake! grrr #picknmix

  13. Harry's Honest Mummy Reply

    Spot on post. Could relate to most of them and found myself nodding as I read through them going “yes, that’s me”. Laughed out loud at the late night one. In theory it should wok but I have now tried it twice and it has failed twice! hahaha #justanotherlinky

  14. El Reply

    Lovely post and I’m still laughing as I type this! I blamed the teeth for such a long time that my mum was asking “Just how many teeth does YOUR baby have?” LOL…Or I use the C word – yes, Colic!! #justanotherlinky

  15. The Speed Bump Reply

    I laughed as soon as I read the first part of the blog – I’m currently one of those mums you want to poke in the eye, my daughter slept through from fairly early on! I’ve tried never to be smug though – I am well aware that baby #2 will be a little sleep thief! Great post, really made me laugh. #fartglitter

    1. MMT Reply

      I believe it’s called Karma πŸ˜‰ Currently loading up with coffee, another number three night! Thanks for stopping by, it’s great to know my sufferring, sorry, blog, is bringing others laughter xxx MMT

  16. acornishmum Reply

    Being an accidental smug mum whose children inherited her heavy sleeping genes and have had lie ins since they were babies …I’m staying out of this one πŸ˜‰
    Thanks for linking up to #Picknmix
    Stevie x

    1. MMT Reply

      Argh Stevie it’s not fair!! I know our time will come again…they’re worth it eh? X

  17. Something Crunchy Mummy Reply

    This is also true – sleep deprivation is the worst!! Thanks for linking up to #justanotherlinky xx

  18. Mama, My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows Reply

    This all sounds very familiar.. except our teething started at 5 months, Currently typing with heavy eyes as my tot decided 5 am was time to get up and wont let me put him down to make coffee. Yawn. Hope you get some sleep soon. Thanks so much for linking up with #fartglitter xxx

  19. mackenzieglanville Reply

    It does get better, unless they are sick they all sleep through, they are 6, 8 and 11 though and it took a while lol, My problem is trying to get the 11 and 6 year old to stay in bed when I put them to bed!! Drives me nuts #coolmumclub

  20. Louise (Little Hearts, Big Love) Reply

    Oh yes, I can definitely relate to all of these types of sleep-deprivation – thank goodness for coffee! Brilliant post – think a lot of tired mums will relate to this! Hope you manage to get some more sleep soon. #coolmumclub

  21. Angela Milnes Reply

    I fee this way so often, it’s crazy ..never enough sleep. Thanks for sharing. These are so so true. Angela x

  22. Anita Cleare Reply

    Definitely brings back memories! Especially the grizzling in the sleep – just loud enough to keep you awake but not loud enough to make you get up (at least, not straight away….)! Thanks for sharing #coolmumclub

  23. Charlotte Reply

    Haha I feel your pain!!! – my son was an ANGEL after the hospital and my mother knowingly laughed at me when I suggested he was a perfect child who would obviously always sleep, she waited… and now at 3 it seems he never sleeps! never has a woman looked so smug! ;p
    Love Charlotte #coolmumclub

    1. MMT Reply

      I always shudder when new mums say their kids are amazing sleepers. I think that’s called the shock of being born?! Thanks for linking up and dropping a comment. Wishing you a night filled with sleep!

  24. Laura @ Life with Baby Kicks Reply

    Number four is the WORST! Never have I swung from FFS you devil child to oh my poor baby come here, sleep in my bed, anything you want you can have….thanks for linking with #effitfriday x

    1. MMT Reply

      Ugh we had a night of multiple factors from this list last night, x 2 kids! aargh! Need sleep πŸ™‚

  25. The Anxious Dragon Reply

    Its a long time since I had little people keeping me awake. My list would include 1) the snoring husband, 2) the playful cat or 3) exactly the same as your number 9

    1. MMT Reply

      Oooh, the cat. Yep we have one of those sleep thieves too! Thanks for reading and commenting lovely x

  26. Mumma McD Reply

    I have been living in sleep deprivation torture land for 4 years now… with no end in sight… WHY DON’T THEY SLEEP???? ARGHHHH!!

  27. newmummyblogcom Reply

    Great post! So so so so true! I can’t put into words how sleep has changed since having a baby, other than it’s nothing like it once was and there’s a lot less of it. I did love the cluster feeding snuggles too, my mummy and baby time, just the two of us. Awwww I miss it #coolmumclub

    1. MMT Reply

      I would probably miss it too, if I wasn’t so tired from a teething, full of cold, rubbish sleeper child! Maybe I should book a night in a hotel…..x πŸ˜‰

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